


Mewni:An Overview

by Cartoon_Idiot_59



Series: GravRickity Falls [3]
Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Other, Pseudo-History
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 01:21:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17971784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cartoon_Idiot_59/pseuds/Cartoon_Idiot_59
Summary: A brief overview of the history of Mewni with particular attention paid to the High Magical Commission. By Dr. Stanford F. Pines, PhD





	Mewni:An Overview

**Author's Note:**

> Expurgated entries from journal 3.

Once upon a time, there was a realm of magic. Of potentiality. This was very early on, millionths of picoseconds after nothing exploded. About the same time as existence ceased being made of quarkonium, the same time as hadrons. Maybe a touch before. There were other pockets of magic, as resonances created the ever splitting Multiverse. But in this area, call it the significant magical sinuosity, there was a realm of magic, from which all magic flowed.

For a long time it was just there, like the strong force, the weak force, electromagnetism and gravity, the other so-called forces. Eventually, life happened and as life does some of it took advantage of the flow of magic. Some creatures partook of it as an essential part of their existence, they had magic. 

In one particular dimension along the significant magical sinuosity, a particular kind of magical wasp stung a remarkably adaptable monkey and a new kind of creature was born. Not one that HAD magic, but one that could USE magic.

At this point, potentiality came into play and with a sound not unlike an Indian raga (the lost chord, some would have it. Others would not have it at all.) a creature made entirely of magic came into being. He was small (three apples high, some would say. Peyo would not.), blue and difficult. He immediately berobed himself and took to waiting in a full lotus position. Morphic resonance. Because creatures that could use magic were evolving, he exists to teach them. He was Sir Glossaryk of Terms. Almost simultaneously another being of pure magic manifested. If Glossaryk taught, she tested. She was also small, white, winged and feline. She had an insatiable appetite. She was Baby. 

Glossaryk and Baby waited patiently for the wasp monkeys to come along, arguing ways and means. It soon became apparent that the females of the form were much more adept at using magic than the males. They all COULD, but the females were that much better. Also as the creatures grew in intelligence, it became clear some families were much more adept as well. 

About the time the creatures started calling themselves Mewmans and developing agriculture, Glossaryk realized that he could only see intimations of the future along the significant magical sinousity. Reality, including the alternate dimensions, areas with other magic, areas with weak magic and areas with NO magic was much larger. Much, MUCH larger. So Glossaryk, believing that creatures of pure magic were dangerously prone to failure in the face of possible interruptions in the flow from the realm of magic took something real, a skull, added horns made of swords (which the Mewmans developed slightly before agriculture) and created Omnitraxis Prime, a being capable of seeing ALL of the multiverse. With Omnitraxis as a guide, Glossaryk and Baby started teaching the most adept from the most adept families. Still fearing the cessation of magic and unsure if the real skull and horns given to Omnitraxis would have effect, Glossaryk created Lekmet from a goat's horn. Lekmet would act as a healer and leader of the group of beings created by Glossaryk. Keeping entropy in mind, Glossaryk created Lekmet to die, his life lessening as he used up his energy to heal. 

Some Mewmans invented crime, so Glossaryk, taking a large crystal, created Rhombulous to encase those guilty of malfeasance in crystal forever (or at least until the flow of magic was interrupted). Rhombulous originally had no arms, but he nagged Glossaryk until Glossaryk gave him his alligator arms (snakes actually, but it amused Glossaryk to tell Rhombulous the wrong name. Difficult.) Rhombulous at this time gifted both Glossaryk and Baby with crystals for their heads, giving them something real so that they would still exist even if the flow of magic ceased.

About this time, the matriarch of one of the most powerful families, the Butterflies, discovered a crystal that could focus magical energy. She invented the first wand. Glossaryk and Baby became bound to the Butterfly family. Also, about this time, word came from across the sea. On another continent some of the creatures that had magic as an intrinsic part of their natures (called Monsters by Mewmans) had started growing the most exciting crop, called corn. Members of the four most powerful families, the Butterflies, the Gorhemghasts, the Otterpops (later to be known as the Spiderbites) and the Johansson Petersons sailed to the continent to investigate the rumors. They had a very difficult winter and nearly died. The heads of the families carved their initials into a stump and renewed their resolve. They also carved the initials DN into the stump, which they held were the initials of the creator. The rumors were true, they called other Mewmans to join them. The great monster massacre soon followed. (To be known by the Mewmans as Mewnipendence day). 

Omnitraxis Prime, studying the possibilities, discovered in the future, far off the significant magical sinuosity, various beings, generally known as Sanchez or Pines found a way to punch holes between dimensions. Portals. Seeing the possibilities and dangers, Glossaryk and Baby set out to create an entity that could create and manipulate portals. Having noticed that the Mewmans and Monsters had their own way of creating new life (called 'sex') they decided to try it. They very much enjoyed the initial experience, but Baby soon became disillusioned. During the birth she became abusive. 

"You did this to me, you blue bastard! YOU! You could've just created it like the others, but NOOO!"

"You're doing fine, dear. You're hurting my hand, though." 

"I'll rip it off, you motherfucker! It's got HORNS, YOU SON OF A BITCH!! IT'S ON FIRE!! I WILL KILL YOU SLOWLY!"

So Hekapoo, mistress of portals was created, in a slightly different manner then the others of what would become over time, known as the High Magical Commission. Glossaryk, himself, didn't care for the Mewman hegemony over Monsters. He believed rational beings were rational beings, but having been bound to the Butterfly family, he couldn't gainsay their wishes. He did have luck with the most unlikely Queen of the Butterfly line, Jushtin the Uncalculated, who as ambassador under his younger sister managed treaties with the Ponyheads, the Lucitors and the Kelpbottoms, creatures that the Mewmans would ordinarily regard as Monsters, despite all of them being able to use magic.

This concludes our brief overview of the history of of Mewni, with special attention given to the High Magical Commission. Having received the information second hand from Jheselbraum the Unswerving I am uncertain about placing it in my journals. I have personally never set foot on Mewni. 

Stanford F. Pines, PhD

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, a non-canonical, rambling on the nature of magic, the history of Mewni, physics, metaphysics, evolution, the Multiverse, fundamental forces, and other meanderings that I am blaming on Ford.


End file.
